Well, with school starting up my life is completely different. I have late classes on Mondays and Tuesdays. Wednesday nights are AWANAs. Thursday I sort of sigh a relief of the end of another week of school, but then it's like a Sunday night because I work Fridays and Saturdays. So, with all this insanity the last two nights were really great. I sort of took a breath and relaxed for the first time since school started. I guess I am used to the new routine so I could relax.

Last night I went to Irene and Tony's house for dinner (Eleanor's Grandma and Grandpa). You wouldn't believe the extravegant meals Irene puts together. Eleanor was adorable, sitting on a phone book so she could reach the table. Irene lit candles and as soon as we sat down Eleanor asked if she could blow them out. I mean, what else would a 4 year old think you would do with candles? When Irene went to dim the lights Eleanor was like "what are you doing?" Needless to say we do not eat by candlelight at home. Eleanor seemed so lit up inside to be with all of us. I played the piano with her before dinner was ready. She just taps along on the high keys while I play Norah Jones or offertories I've played in the past. She obviously has no idea what she is doing, but she sort of keeps my rhythm and style. And both before and after dinner we played legos. At first I felt overwhelmed by the gigantic box of mismatched legos. We sort of started playing with stuff as if it were polly pocket or Barbie. Different heads on different bodies, all riding the horses, we weren't really building anything. But after awhile that gets old. I decided I needed to build something. So I made a house and a jeep. It took me forever to find the right sized pieces. I asked a friend how boys play with legos. He said, they put them together to make a weapon and then hurt someone with it. Maybe I'll try that next time. Anyhow, Eleanor was so happy last night. I am sad when I think on all the time I'm missing out on with her while I am at school and at work. One more year......

Tonight was supposed to be the Angels game, but someone decided the parking lot looked filled to the brim so a few friends, many old and one new, went to Fridays. Luckily my good friend Jason was serving on the patio so we didn't have to wait long. Just strolled over to the block and got coffee and then came right back and sat down. It was amazing outside. Conversation was great...except for the parts about helicopters. It appears that even though we are all old enough to be experts in our fields, we couldn't give advice to save our lives. Anyhow, it was great to catch up and hang out with some really fun people.

Then on the way home it started to rain.....I love rain. So I just drove around for a long time and listened to a cd I just got. There was thunder and lightening. I really didn't think about anything. Just enjoyed it. And I thought about how amazing it was that I COULD just enjoy it. I wasn't worrying about anything. I didn't wish I was anywhere else. I didn't wish anyone else was around. I was just at peace. Maybe some of you have this all the time so you don't know what the big deal is....but I rarely feel so content. Lately I just feel so spectacular.

I know why. It's because something has really changed in my life. I am in love with God. I mean, I am following Him, I am reading His word, I am doing His work. I am not looking for a pat on the back, trust me. For the longest time I was putting a whole lot of effort into trying to fix myself and it isn't me who deserves any credit for the place I am at. Before I really wasn't putting my hope and my trust in Him. But God never gave up on me when I was going about all the wrong ways of trying to get closer to Him. He has really pulled me out of my despair and given me a new song, a hope! All I really needed to do was just give everything to Him.

This doesn't mean that you should stop praying for me.....I only told you the good stuff that's going on lately. The devil is there all the more because of what God is trying to accomplish in my life. I've got a rough week coming up. Test on Monday and Tuesday as well as birthday stuff for Eleanor next week. Pray for me?

I like to daydream about the day when school will be a distant memory. I am playing at the park with my nephew and catching up with my sister. I'm riding bikes around the neighborhood with Ella. I'm learning to play without sheet music in Larry's garage. I'm getting to know a friend better over a cup of coffee. I am shopping with my Mom and find the perfect shirt, or shoe, or dress. I'm at Magic Mountain with my favorite people.

Back to the present...Off to bed. Love you all!